I knew the risk. If my name does not come up on that list, I’d have to walk through the thick air of pity. But, if my name shows up, it would be a celebration. And the list crawled slowly up and each name passed with patient anxiety.

Until I made it.

And a deluge of gratefulness flooded the room. Four and a half years spent bound, now I could let myself be carried by the stream.

I’ve been posting art online since 2013. Blaze has been my online persona from the heydays of deviantArt. What a pivot it would take for a furry artist to straddle two disjoint interests. In my youth, never in my life did I decide that one day I would enter the legal profession, more so even attempt to enter. But when I took that undertaking in 2021 after graduating from college, I’d have the day of my bar exam results circled in deep red ink. To call it a dream would be an understatement. For me, it was to get to that point no matter what. I’ve always wanted to find myself as a lawyer. And that became reality. I found myself being a furry artist, and also a lawyer.

Lately I’ve been preparing documents, polishing my résumé, rubbing elbows, and trying to act like a lawyer. Despite the impending personality change, you guys have shaped me into who the best version of me (so far!) The peak wasn’t reached alone. I’m glad to have a village that paved this road, and a slew of people to thank.

To my followers, thank you for being there through thick and thin. Many times have I heard from online creators that going cold turkey kills the momentum you’ve built. Corollary, followers are there for your content and not yourself. Those postulates were wrong. I’ve gone far, and you went along. When I wouldn’t post for a while, I saw the patience from you guys. From twitter to bluesky, it’s been wild. I’m so happy you’re here with me. And I’m glad to take these next steps forward with y'all.

To my discord server, for the longest time it's been a little silent, until a few good pals made it lively, then it snowballed into a creature in itself. My god, I love going in and seeing what’s being talked about. Interacting with you guys has been a blast. I joke about blowing up the server a lot, but your conversations and support kept me going when it felt like I couldn’t go any further. Each morning, the first thing I read is what happened while I was asleep. It was a sacrifice to keep my head down during the bar exam, but I’m glad you all stayed.

To BURN, my beloved Guild Wars 2 guild, who are full of just the quirkiest, unabashedly furry folk, who allowed me to stay my course in a sea of opposing currents, thank you for helping me center myself when the world gets a little bit complicated. I don’t know how I could survive the trials of law school if it wasn’t for the whimsical insanity that comes up from time to time. I lost track of the hours we spent in voice chats enjoying content together. And when the time came for me to study, I would never be scared of returning. I could come back and talk like I was always there. For MMORPGS, it is the players that make the game worth playing. But it isn’t about Guild Wars 2 anymore, it’s about the strong lines of friendship we built throughout the past 5 years (and counting!). Here’s to many more voice chats in the future.

To Kuk, being the first has its perks. You’ve been with me since god knows when. Maybe to put a date on it, since tumblr was a functioning website. Thank you for keeping me informed about the furry world. Thank you for being one of my trusted individuals. It's so unfair for us to be just online friends, when it feels like you’ve walked by my side since we were young. (I mean we’re still young, but you get the point.) One day we’ll meet and it’ll be one of the happiest days of my life.

To Wes, you are the closest to being a furry father figure to me, even if we aren’t really THAT far apart in age. You always have your maturity that always sets me straight, even in the face of fire. I would have gone off the rails a lot of times if it wasn’t for you. That calmness is something I aspire to have. It’s a moral. It’s a tonesetter in a fast-paced environment. Every person needs a Wes in their life.

To Raiizn, who was there for me at my loneliest, and who I will keep living and breathing for, who was always a kind soul, and who always cheered me on, wherever you are: with the stars or with the sun, thank you showing me that even in the darkest there is still light within us that is worth protecting and worth cherishing. Words cannot express how much I’m thankful for you. I hope that you found peace in the turbulence.

To my college friends, the Sebastian to this Mia, a huge chunk of my wandering tendency was cultured from college where I was lost. The transition to higher education was a storm that came from left field. It pours cold water over the flames on your back. But I’m glad I met like-minded individuals who allowed me to be as ambitious and soar high. It made me who I was today. Dreaming is free, but executing it takes resources. Growing up is a test of attrition. Some friendships don't make it and that's ok. There’s a time for everything to end. I hope we both achieve our dreams. I hope one day we can sit down and talk about it. Till then, wherever you are and whatever form you may be, you still have my thanks.

To MK, stop comparing us to Mia and Sebastian, okay? At least we still talk. It would be a disgrace for me to leave you with a short paragraph, because our history is richer than the net worth of any parasitic-billionaire. It’s a treasure trove of inside jokes. But I know, that you know, that what I mean is true: Thank you for everything from the moment you talked to me to the moment we have right now, and including the messy in-betweens. I’m always grateful for those moments, for the unconditional support.

To my closest friends, the true holders of “blazelore”: from violent supernovas, till my life cooled down, I don’t know where I would be if it weren’t for you guys. My view on myself is always neurotic. I fear the worst because I feel like the worst always happens. I sound like a pretty heavy friend to carry. But what the hell, you guys stuck to me like glue. I don’t know why, I don’t know how, but why would I question friendships that survived the test of time. In these silent days, we always have each other to rely on. You guys are the undeniable proof that friendships never decay. In a world where relationships are treated as transactional, opportunities for content, I’m so glad I know I have your back. Trust has always been an issue for me, but never when it comes to you guys.

And to those who watched from far away, this victory is yours the same as it is mine.

With all the love in the world,
Atty. Blaze Silverwolf

Truer words have never been spoken. Ever since I entered law school, I set myself up to have this year circled in red ink. The bar exam was the definite event of 2025, to the exclusion of everything else. Because of my school’s schedule, I had a dearth of time. But that was not at my disposal. Long swaths of time were earmarked for studying.

Mentally my brain was elsewhere, far away from being able to catch up with the community I love. And after all, it was not just the bar exam. Residual heartbreak, the common depression, all the moods that come with the cold isolation of studying pile on top.

Despite this I found support. Everyone still showed up when I came out from the cave on sporadic opportunities. I’d put something out and you’d still come. And when it came time to face the monster, you all showed up. I can’t thank you enough. Even in the times when I’d feel like I was at my loneliest, that constant has always proven wrong. People will show up.

Though law is not my only personality. I’ll admit: A lot of my other skills took a hit. It was a necessary sacrifice, but a tough one. I put out all that I could. But there’s still the pang of wishing I could do more. This desire grew into casting my nets in unknown waters. For the first time in my life, I got into technical drawing. It scratches the logical itch I find in drawing, and I’ve yet to marry that with expressive explosions. While I found something missing, there is still something to be obtained in my art. After all the practice, I hope you’ll also be there when I get my groove back to post weekly.

Next year I really want to focus a lot more on being able to be able to apply what I’ve been practicing. Truth be told, I wasn’t satisfied with the output this year. There is a disconnect between what I study and what I apply in painting. The result is frustration. I wanna be able to trust the fundamentals I’ve learned. If I manage to pull that off, it would be a great achievement. But the end result is trying to give my art more depth, more love baked into it. As I said, I’ll need more time. This isn’t just for self-improvement, but a way for me to return all the love and support you gave me, like an investment. Capitalist language aside, it’s time to get used to the long grind for improvement.

It gives room for the inevitable future that I’ll have a job. I can’t stay supported by my family forever. And with the results just around the corner, I will have to make a living to survive society. I cannot say for sure that I will have another off-year (in terms of art) like 2025, but I will strive to make 2026 one of the best years creatively.

I had a lot of other solid achievements. I graduated from law school, started this website, first time traveling without my parents, started going to the gym more and growing(?????????) and a lot more shenanigans.

Though I’ll leave 2025 with an open door. The results are still pending. And just like with art, opportunities are still endless. This year was rife with trials and tribulations. I hope it's all worth it next year. See you in 2026.

I’ve been getting back into furaffinity.
It simply won without doing nothing too drastic

Of course, controversies aside it’s still the last one standing. Setting it up again gives me some sort of epiphany on the state of art sites.

Though my focus is on the layout. See most places where people post art tend to be in sites where the content is forced in a constant scrolling stream. Art is forced to compete with videos, texts, memes, and shitposts. And if you dont get the attention of the person in such a short span, its gone. A person scrolls up and the connection between the viewer and the art is severed. The pieces that took 3-4 weeks to make has a shelf life of 15-18 mins[1] for twitter and twitter-like websites. But this is counter to the need to have time and effort put into your piece. Painters take long sittings to render a part of their art. Regardless of medium, digital or traditional, creating takes time. That’s why social media sites are not the best place to post art, or to have a main site about art. It’s not meant for art! It’s meant for rapid fire in-the-moment posting

Furaffinity is a breath of fresh air in the sense that there is no scrolling timeline, there is no feed. Its only between you and the people you follow. And you can see what art they posted in your messages. It has that same “corner of the world” feel that this website has. The art posted can live for as long as it’s up. There is definitely no competition here. It’s the reason why I think tumblr and cara fell flat. Cara is too professional has a scrolling feature and tumblr just died. Bluesky isn’t even for artists. It’s twitter without nazis!

Thats why I made this website, and got back in FA. Having a website that stays in place without changing every time you refresh is calm. A big issue I’ve been having lately is being forced to post a whole new painting[2] every Sunday. That is not sustainable at all. But its so easy to get lost in the pace of social media. You have to keep posting to be relevant. For busy people who aren’t chronically online[3]: A nightmare. Whoever said social media is the future definitely thought everyone would enjoy being in an information primordial soup.

All this is just a long winded explanation as to why I haven’t been posting regularly lately. It is technically impressive to post one new piece every week, but that tends to plateau. I’ve been so antsy about the quality of my work, and maybe taking longer times to enjoy the process will lead to better quality. Most of the better quality artists don’t even post every week. This race to post is a symptom of being addicted to the rush of likes. It’s just too much.

Anyway, here’s my furaffinity: https://www.furaffinity.net/user/itsdablazewolf
You can also talk to me on my discord server: https://discord.com/invite/9vj6R38SEV

That’s all from the wolfcat’s desk. Bye!

[1] - https://levitatemedia.com/learn/understand-content-lifespan-maximize-post-life
[2] - Painting in this context means a finished piece
[3] - Me